"Shock Horror: Kebabs Taking Over British High Streets!" Welcome to the UK - the land where the humble Kebab, an innocent wrap of thinly sliced meat sprinkled with colourful veggies,…
Curry Houses: The Slippery Saboteur of British Values!? In the broad and adventurous world of British gastronomy – herein referring to the culinary realm that staunchly asserts beans on toast…
Alien Invasion: Halal Snacks Going Mainstream Do you recall the good old days when a humble cheese sandwich was a perfectly acceptable lunch option? When your greatest dietary concern was…
Mozzarella Marauders: Migrant Madness Targets Pizza! There's a thick waft of panic in the air taking a stronghold over our nation, and it's not because of Prince Charles' impending kingship.…
"Invasion Alert! Migrants Now Stealing Our Tea Bags!" Just when you thought you'd heard it all, get ready for the next wave of panic-inducing, end-of-the-world-as-we-know-it, "they're taking everything" paranoia as…
SION: How Shawarma Will Devour British Identity! I tremble as I write this, bombarded by the dire realization that our dear Queen's English is losing its purity - one falafel…
Curry Shortages Spark Panic Among Reform UK Fans It's the end of Britain as we know it. The Great British Curry Crisis of 2022. The time when the nefarious plot…
Wave of Kebabs: Britain's Bizarre Bed-Time Blues! No, this isn’t the plot of the latest Celebrity Masterchef; it's the stuff of nightmares for devout believers of good-ol' British order and…
Dastardly Doner Kebabs: Hijack Our High Streets? As comforting as a lukewarm tea on a Tuesday, the hoarse howls of the traditional Reform UK type voters never fail to amuse.…
Brexit: Beware Immigrant Penguins on Our Doorstep Listen up, Britons! Stop ploughing your way through puddings, forget your milkman dramas, and for heaven's sake, lay down that third pint of…
